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What type of person would I be if I hadn’t experienced so much internalized shame around my body? Having been in Spain for about a week now, one of the most significant cultural differences I’ve experienced, while living in the coastal town of Alicante, has been the way sexuality and nudity are viewed by people in Spain. Before coming to Spain, I was aware of the stereotype that European women tend to take more liberties and that nude beaches are not an uncommon experience in Europe. However, now that I’m staying in a town that is centrally located from the beach, I have experienced firsthand the way in which nudity is treated within Spain.
From the ages of 7 to 14, I attended a private Catholic school that strictly enforced uniforms and dress codes on their student body, in particular the girls. For this reason, modesty was a topic I was familiar with from a very young age, and till this day it continues to shape my fashion and clothing choices. Having grown up with this constant monitoring of my fashion choices as a child and early teenager I learned to internalize the idea that dressing a certain way or showing certain body parts is what makes someone “provocative” or “attention-seeking”. However, since being in Spain, I’ve begun to explore the ways in which purity culture and an insistence on modesty is just yet another way the patriarchy works to keep women small.
I think one of the biggest reasons why nudity in Spain is much more normalized is that Spanish women are not taught to shame themselves for having feminine figures. In the United States, I’ve noticed from a young age women often receive the message to “cover up because there are men around”. This message is often both extremely harmful as well as toxic because it sends the message to young girls that they are responsible for controlling the reactions of men. However, by talking with various Spanish women I’ve learned that women who grew up in Spain do not receive this same type of internalized message to cover up and be modest. Instead, men in Spain are generally taught to look with respect rather than lust. As a result, men are more aware of the ways in which their attention may be making women uncomfortable. In this way, women who grow up in Spain are less self-conscious of their bodies simply because they’re taught that their bodies were respected rather than shamed.
The culmination of my observations of the cultural differences surrounding nudity has resulted in the understanding that the shame women experience surrounding their bodies is an internalized process. The idea that women should dress in a way that appeases the male gaze is not only harmful but dangerous. This type of thinking enforces the idea that women exist as objects of sexualization and polices women’s expression of sexuality through their clothing. As I continue to learn and reflect on the differences that exist between how people in America view and treat nudity vs. how people in Spain view this same topic. I feel grateful to have this experience to reflect on my own personal identity. I hope that my story of growing up in an environment that heavily policed the clothing choices of young girls is able to resonate with other women, as well as help bring light to new perspectives surrounding the topic of nudity.